I have written a few short pieces of varying topics. I shared my postpartum experience on Postpartum Confessions, for better or worse. I felt very brave writing that piece, but some days I wonder why I felt the need to (over)share.
The other piece was business related. It was for the Craft Industry Alliance, and I hope to find another interesting topic to write about in the future.
To keep other creative avenues open, I have become a performer for the Boston Mortified stage show. It is exhilaratingly fun to get up in front of a live audience, with a light shining on you, reading things you wrote when you were a teenager. In just a few short months I turn forty, and there is something cathartic in being able to read this stuff out loud with people listening. I have many emotions about the whole process and experience- as at this point in my life I have come to believe that I am having a mid-life crisis of sorts. Nothing bad, but more of an "Oh, shit!" I am more than likely done with half of my life and I have so many more things I want to do! There are so many options that I am not even fully aware of all the things I want to experience and do and accomplish.
On stage at the Oberon in Cambridge, MA, February 2016 |
There is regret, too. I regret that I took my body and my health for granted. If I could go back and shake my skinny self hard into the realization that my pompous attitude that I got "lucky" being thin and beautiful would never go away was complete fallacy, I would. Because now I am a middle aged fat lady who has health issues (some related to the weight, some not but aggravated by such) with a five year old little spit fire who is active and wants me to keep up with her but I barely can because of that former attitude. I didn't take care of myself. I took it all for granted. I thought what I felt at 17, 20, or even 25 was going to last. I am mad at myself for that.
Junior year, 1992-1993 |
Ironically, I like myself way more now, though, as the woman I have become. I am proud of my accomplishments. I am so happy to be able to have the luxury to pursue my crafty business. My day to day life is good, and while I would love to fix a few things the direction is good.
Believe it or not, this is a better pic of me than most these days. |
Currier Museum, Manchester, NH, February 2016 |